Charlie and I broke up today.
I did it over the phone, crying from the safety of my office 200 kilometres away.
But it really happened the day we got back home 6 months ago.
July 31, 2004 on our way home
We drove back into Halifax and then started our journey home.
The few things I can remember about making our way back to Toronto are not that interesting in themselves, but I do remember a sustained peace between Charlie and I - maybe because we knew we'd be going back to being us ...to having to deal with eachother or letting eachother go ...because we COULD do that, at home, where it was safe.
Here all we had was eachother.
We had brunch the next day in Quebec city - and Quebec city is beautiful. The old part is so twisty and windy and it scared the crap out of me but I loved it. I loved how it was obvious that a place could give its people their character just as much as people can give a place its character.
Quebec was old and hard and difficult to traverse but it was beautiful and unique...and permanent.
Something I wondered about Charlie and I.
The bloom had long been off the rose by this time, and as I watched him now, when he didn't know I was looking at him, I wondered if he'd thought the same thing about us.
The next day: Excitement in my belly as we hit the stretch of 401 that I recognized.
Excitement and a sweet sick feeling - I can now see the comfort of the desert island dilemma...
the road trip, the shipwreck, the arranged marriage, the incarceration, the fleeing and the lonliness.
The few things I can remember about making our way back to Toronto are not that interesting in themselves, but I do remember a sustained peace between Charlie and I - maybe because we knew we'd be going back to being us ...to having to deal with eachother or letting eachother go ...because we COULD do that, at home, where it was safe.
Here all we had was eachother.
We had brunch the next day in Quebec city - and Quebec city is beautiful. The old part is so twisty and windy and it scared the crap out of me but I loved it. I loved how it was obvious that a place could give its people their character just as much as people can give a place its character.
Quebec was old and hard and difficult to traverse but it was beautiful and unique...and permanent.
Something I wondered about Charlie and I.
The bloom had long been off the rose by this time, and as I watched him now, when he didn't know I was looking at him, I wondered if he'd thought the same thing about us.
The next day: Excitement in my belly as we hit the stretch of 401 that I recognized.
Excitement and a sweet sick feeling - I can now see the comfort of the desert island dilemma...
the road trip, the shipwreck, the arranged marriage, the incarceration, the fleeing and the lonliness.
July 30, 2004 evening
The rest of my trip with Charlie will have to be written from memory, as I stopped journaling after the entry just before this one. I'm not sure why.
I am writing this on May 21, 2009.
Halifax left us looking forward to our journey home.
Before we left Nova Scotia, however, Charlie wanted to visit Peggy's Cove, a little maudlin, but I played along. As we rolled into the sleepy town off the highway, evening was just starting to set in and so we stopped first at the memorial "rock" (best name I can come up with for this place) that honored the victims of the Swissair flight that went down - 229 people died here. It was a little ...appropriate? ...that we were there just as the sun was setting, because in this beautiful place, with the sun shining - it would be hard to imagine such tragedy.
But the dimly lit beach area made us very solemn and the rock or rocks? were set up in a way that made it look like this place was waiting for someone, someones... I do remember that the rocks were very large (or was it one rock?).
When Charlie had had enough silent time, we headed back to the van and drove into the town (proper) of Peggy's Cove. We stopped at the souvenir-slash-post office-slash-restaurant building and parked just in time to see the most beautiful sunset I'd seen in years, maybe decades.
Charlie wanted to get some postcards and mail it there so that the postage stamp would be stamped "Peggy's Cove" - and he sent one to everyone he knew. Jesus, Mary and Joseph.
I am writing this on May 21, 2009.
Halifax left us looking forward to our journey home.
Before we left Nova Scotia, however, Charlie wanted to visit Peggy's Cove, a little maudlin, but I played along. As we rolled into the sleepy town off the highway, evening was just starting to set in and so we stopped first at the memorial "rock" (best name I can come up with for this place) that honored the victims of the Swissair flight that went down - 229 people died here. It was a little ...appropriate? ...that we were there just as the sun was setting, because in this beautiful place, with the sun shining - it would be hard to imagine such tragedy.
But the dimly lit beach area made us very solemn and the rock or rocks? were set up in a way that made it look like this place was waiting for someone, someones... I do remember that the rocks were very large (or was it one rock?).
When Charlie had had enough silent time, we headed back to the van and drove into the town (proper) of Peggy's Cove. We stopped at the souvenir-slash-post office-slash-restaurant building and parked just in time to see the most beautiful sunset I'd seen in years, maybe decades.
Charlie wanted to get some postcards and mail it there so that the postage stamp would be stamped "Peggy's Cove" - and he sent one to everyone he knew. Jesus, Mary and Joseph.
July 30, 2004
Charlie, I have decided, is a worthy opponent.
"... cause maybe you're gonna be the one that saves me..." is playing in the background (Wonderwall by Oasis).
I've had an amazing day. One of the best this whole trip. We went tidal bore rafting this morning, had a great steak for lunch, and then we decided to skip our last night's campsite and head for home. I'm so happy to be going home. I'm getting friendlier by the mile.
The Tall Ships were nice but they weren't so tall and not as cool as I was led to believe. My favourite was the Mexican ship where I got to take a picture with the handsome captain - all other crew looked like clones of Carlos, 5'1" former store manager of #49!
Our second night in Halifax, I had bad pub food and a Keith's beer since they f*#%ing make such a big deal about the only beer they make here in Nova Scotia. All I keep thinking of is that crazy f*#%er in the kilt on the Alexander Keith's commercials.
It was ok, better than the food - good label. Charlie also had one (and I was still painfully aware of how upset he got when I nixed the tour of the brewery on our first night - $10 to walk around and hear how great the beer is!?). Who needs it!? I'd rather buy myself dinner.
"... cause maybe you're gonna be the one that saves me..." is playing in the background (Wonderwall by Oasis).
I've had an amazing day. One of the best this whole trip. We went tidal bore rafting this morning, had a great steak for lunch, and then we decided to skip our last night's campsite and head for home. I'm so happy to be going home. I'm getting friendlier by the mile.
back to catching up... By Wednesday morning we were headed for Halifax and got there in time to have dinner there and walk around the pier. I didn't have to cook - yeh! 2 nights in Halifax and we went out for dinner both nights! I now know why my mother enjoys being taken out so much. I even found my self saying "next time we'll take a different vacation, one where we get waited on hand and foot - no dishes, no cooking".
I could see the look of hurt feelings (I knew it so well) coming across his face - so I quickly recovered the ball - besides I REALLY have enjoyed this time away - but it's nice to change things up.
I could see the look of hurt feelings (I knew it so well) coming across his face - so I quickly recovered the ball - besides I REALLY have enjoyed this time away - but it's nice to change things up.
The Tall Ships were nice but they weren't so tall and not as cool as I was led to believe. My favourite was the Mexican ship where I got to take a picture with the handsome captain - all other crew looked like clones of Carlos, 5'1" former store manager of #49!Our second night in Halifax, I had bad pub food and a Keith's beer since they f*#%ing make such a big deal about the only beer they make here in Nova Scotia. All I keep thinking of is that crazy f*#%er in the kilt on the Alexander Keith's commercials.
It was ok, better than the food - good label. Charlie also had one (and I was still painfully aware of how upset he got when I nixed the tour of the brewery on our first night - $10 to walk around and hear how great the beer is!?). Who needs it!? I'd rather buy myself dinner.
Having not been completely satisfied with dinner, I was determined to get a Beaver's Tail for dessert - pure heaven! Deep fried pastry with sugar & cinnamon sprinkled on + lemon squeezed over it. Charlie took 2 bites of mine but was sulking as he was tired and wanted to go back to the van to sleep (in the parking lot one street up from the harbour - actually pretty cool digs).
July 29, 2004
I can't believe I haven't written since Monday! Of course, talking to you yesterday was kind of my therapy writing for the day. We stayed in Grosse Morne on Monday night. It is a beautiful national park with so many things to do. We went on 2 hikes, checked out the pond at Water Brook pond (?) it's supposed to be the purest lake in the world, almost completely surrounded by mountains. We also stayed (that night) in Shallow Bay - it's 4km of white sandy beach. Tuesday afternoon we found ourselves heading for the ferry at Port aux Basques, to go back to Nova Scotia and civilization.
Note: re: the purest lake. I wanted to pee in it just to keep it from disappointment later when someone else would be sure to defile its purity - and funnily enough, you mentioned that on the phone, days later, and Charlie and I joked about it at the time.
Note: re: the purest lake. I wanted to pee in it just to keep it from disappointment later when someone else would be sure to defile its purity - and funnily enough, you mentioned that on the phone, days later, and Charlie and I joked about it at the time.
July 26, 2004 3:00pm-ish
Before I continue about Sunday's activity I'll talk about this moment. Charlie is in the back looking at the engine because the oil sound just went off. He sat in the doorway that was open which let in a very large fly which still may be in the van laying thousands of eggs as I write this! I said something about letting all the flies in and why don't you come in and sit down and he gives me the look of death. He gets up, slams the door and goes and sits on the curb. This would normally be an invitation to dance, so to speak. I'd be indignant and say in a loud voice "what?!" or "why the look?" or "you're being so mean, blah blah blah..." But instead I said nothing - he belted out a few commands and as I sat waiting without asking what was going on, it occured to me:
(a) Charlie was still a boy finding his own way, finding out how to just BE or maybe it was his thing to do in this life (as per my astrology for the soul book) - to fight back and create boundaries. But not for me.
(b) I need to let go needing to be right and righteous all the time.
Admittedly, I could have killed him where he stood with the swell of anger that ran through me at that moment. But it went away just as quickly. Thus ends the story of how Charlie came very close to death in Badger, Newfoundland. How close, he'll never know.
Incidentally, by my keeping quiet, he quickly came around and even asked if he could get me anything from the store up the road. Lord in heaven, I have stumbled upon something as valuable as the fountain of youth!
(a) Charlie was still a boy finding his own way, finding out how to just BE or maybe it was his thing to do in this life (as per my astrology for the soul book) - to fight back and create boundaries. But not for me.
(b) I need to let go needing to be right and righteous all the time.
Admittedly, I could have killed him where he stood with the swell of anger that ran through me at that moment. But it went away just as quickly. Thus ends the story of how Charlie came very close to death in Badger, Newfoundland. How close, he'll never know.
Incidentally, by my keeping quiet, he quickly came around and even asked if he could get me anything from the store up the road. Lord in heaven, I have stumbled upon something as valuable as the fountain of youth!
July 25, 2004 Bedtime
So much to catch up on - so, where did I leave off? Friday we looked around St. John's some more, got an oil change, rode our bikes and I insisted (when Charlie the tri-athlete wanted to ride the bikes up Signal Hill) that we dismount and go to pick up the van. We seem to start fights like a fire throws sparks off.. but we're getting better at making friends sooner, afterwards.
Sue Sue, you would love St. John's and Newfoundland, the kind of house you're looking for is all over this province. We finished off Friday with dinner at a good local cheap place and I had Fish & Chips (fresh cod). The night before, I had pan-fried cod - very good.
We woke up Saturday morning in Butler Pot - what a cute place! I could hear the loons calling. I feel pretty loony right now, I'm discovering how accurate that Astrology for the Soul book was. I DO always need to be right! It's why Charlie seems to react to me like fire to fuel... I'm practising the art of letting go. On Friday, when we went up to Signal Hill and then over to Fort Amherst overlooking St. John's harbour, I truly became envious of muffin-head and could only think, how lucky she is to come from such a beautiful place.
On Saturday we went back into St. John's and finished touring the city. Charlie bought me a beautiful necklace and earrings set made with lapis lazuli stone, very appropriate for me as it is supposed to aid in meditation and opening up your third eye; also good for intuition and something .... obviously not improving your memory.
I wanted to get going Saturday so that we wouldn't get to Terra Nova late - supposed to be a beautiful Provincial Park and huge ...the Trans Canada goes right through if for a while.
With St. John's finally behind us, I prepared some steaks for dinner when we got to Terra Nova and broke open the bottle of wine that I got along the way, at a gas station. I love that! ..that you could pick up your wine while you're filling up your car.
Looking back so far at the week I have been away, I cannot fathom, with all we've done, that I've only missed 5 days of work. It feels like I've been away for months. Our steak and wine dinner went very well as I ended up drinking most of the wine. The Argentinian wine did the trick. I became a lot friendlier! With no water or an advil before passing out, I was very achy the next morning. I walked to the bathroom very early in the morning. Near the bathroom (from somewhere in the bushes) a growling sound was present - I immediately thought, "bear!" - then after pausing, waiting, I realized it was some freak that was snoring way too loud from inside his tent.
Sunday morning was a sleep in. Laundry, reading the paper (St. John's "the Telegram") and drinking coffee. Charlie and I need to get better at having longer stretches of peacetime because when we argue it really scares me. I will fill you in on more of Sunday tomorrow but one memory from the day - I was roasting marshmallows after dinner and I got a really good 'skin' (when you roast the outside, pull the skin off and continue to roast the inside left-over)... and I said out loud "now THAT'S life - a roasting marshmallow". Very simple. Very easy to live by. Charlie and I sat together in front of the fire - we still had a spat close to bedtime - but we are, as of this moment, friends.
Sue Sue, you would love St. John's and Newfoundland, the kind of house you're looking for is all over this province. We finished off Friday with dinner at a good local cheap place and I had Fish & Chips (fresh cod). The night before, I had pan-fried cod - very good.
We woke up Saturday morning in Butler Pot - what a cute place! I could hear the loons calling. I feel pretty loony right now, I'm discovering how accurate that Astrology for the Soul book was. I DO always need to be right! It's why Charlie seems to react to me like fire to fuel... I'm practising the art of letting go. On Friday, when we went up to Signal Hill and then over to Fort Amherst overlooking St. John's harbour, I truly became envious of muffin-head and could only think, how lucky she is to come from such a beautiful place.
On Saturday we went back into St. John's and finished touring the city. Charlie bought me a beautiful necklace and earrings set made with lapis lazuli stone, very appropriate for me as it is supposed to aid in meditation and opening up your third eye; also good for intuition and something .... obviously not improving your memory.
I wanted to get going Saturday so that we wouldn't get to Terra Nova late - supposed to be a beautiful Provincial Park and huge ...the Trans Canada goes right through if for a while.
With St. John's finally behind us, I prepared some steaks for dinner when we got to Terra Nova and broke open the bottle of wine that I got along the way, at a gas station. I love that! ..that you could pick up your wine while you're filling up your car.
Looking back so far at the week I have been away, I cannot fathom, with all we've done, that I've only missed 5 days of work. It feels like I've been away for months. Our steak and wine dinner went very well as I ended up drinking most of the wine. The Argentinian wine did the trick. I became a lot friendlier! With no water or an advil before passing out, I was very achy the next morning. I walked to the bathroom very early in the morning. Near the bathroom (from somewhere in the bushes) a growling sound was present - I immediately thought, "bear!" - then after pausing, waiting, I realized it was some freak that was snoring way too loud from inside his tent.
Sunday morning was a sleep in. Laundry, reading the paper (St. John's "the Telegram") and drinking coffee. Charlie and I need to get better at having longer stretches of peacetime because when we argue it really scares me. I will fill you in on more of Sunday tomorrow but one memory from the day - I was roasting marshmallows after dinner and I got a really good 'skin' (when you roast the outside, pull the skin off and continue to roast the inside left-over)... and I said out loud "now THAT'S life - a roasting marshmallow". Very simple. Very easy to live by. Charlie and I sat together in front of the fire - we still had a spat close to bedtime - but we are, as of this moment, friends.
July 23, 2004
We ate a pub dinner in St. John's last night then walked around a bit - we decided to forego our campsite (already paid for) and instead, drive up to Cape Spear, again - more like Cape Fear!! Charlie parked the van and we slept in the lot overlooking the ocean and the cliffs. The night ended with Charlie finding out that Sophie was still in the hospital, mainly from a B-12 deficiency ...and then he called her in her hospital room. She will stay until they see some improvement. Charlie (I can see him coming down the stairs now, from the cliff that the lighthouse is on) has gone to purchase a book on resettled communities.
He just likes to own things.
We had a bad tiff last night but they all seem to stem from me making him feel like I'm telling him what to do...or that I'm not validating the good things he brings to the relationship. Despite our nattering at eachother, I really think we are good together - we most often bring eachother up and with him, right now, I don't feel that going above and beyond my station in life is impossible.
He is back to the van now and I realize that all he really wants is what most guys want - to feel like they are better than or as good as their fathers, and to feel like we look up to them and approve of 80% of their "stuff".
We had a bad tiff last night but they all seem to stem from me making him feel like I'm telling him what to do...or that I'm not validating the good things he brings to the relationship. Despite our nattering at eachother, I really think we are good together - we most often bring eachother up and with him, right now, I don't feel that going above and beyond my station in life is impossible.
He is back to the van now and I realize that all he really wants is what most guys want - to feel like they are better than or as good as their fathers, and to feel like we look up to them and approve of 80% of their "stuff".
I am sitting on a rock as I write this and the ocean is in front of me and Charlie is heading over... this moment, this is peace, tranquility. I rarely stop to enjoy it. Charlie is now taking a picture of me and has commanded me NOT to look at him as I write this. The irises grow wild here and are so beautiful. One thing Charlie and I have managed to agree on is - we could both live here.July 22, 2004 12:00pm
We spent the night in Notre Dame Provincial Park off the Trans Canada highway (on our way to St. John's) and spent a really nice morning taking our time - just relaxing with a coffee and breakfast - it was nice.... kind of like when we first started dating.
Charlie HAD to stop in Gander at the Aviation museum - Museum's are sometimes creepy, with those 1930's mannequins that they dress up in WWI and WWII uniforms. Charlie got a postcard with the picture of all the planes that landed on September 11th, 2001 in Gander, Newfoundland when all the flights were grounded. He is now looking for a post-office to mail it immediately - the Tourist Info. office is a little portable on the side of the highway. He is so child-like sometimes, yet all his instincts and decisions have been BANG ON!! ...right on the money. I have never seen anyo
ne with such good luck, or maybe it's not luck - maybe it's just an entitlement attitude - he always operates as if things can't HELP but go his way. I need to start doing more of that.
FYI - We are currently gassing up and it is Charlie's turn to pay so of course, we still had a 1/4 tank left :p
We are finally leaving the boring town of Gander. I miss my mother. Is that strange, or what? Charlie has made up for the gas annoyance by bringing back pop and chocolate to the van for the
Charlie HAD to stop in Gander at the Aviation museum - Museum's are sometimes creepy, with those 1930's mannequins that they dress up in WWI and WWII uniforms. Charlie got a postcard with the picture of all the planes that landed on September 11th, 2001 in Gander, Newfoundland when all the flights were grounded. He is now looking for a post-office to mail it immediately - the Tourist Info. office is a little portable on the side of the highway. He is so child-like sometimes, yet all his instincts and decisions have been BANG ON!! ...right on the money. I have never seen anyo
ne with such good luck, or maybe it's not luck - maybe it's just an entitlement attitude - he always operates as if things can't HELP but go his way. I need to start doing more of that.FYI - We are currently gassing up and it is Charlie's turn to pay so of course, we still had a 1/4 tank left :p
We are finally leaving the boring town of Gander. I miss my mother. Is that strange, or what? Charlie has made up for the gas annoyance by bringing back pop and chocolate to the van for the
rest of our journey. Life is good.
FYI - when we read our email yesterday, Charlie found out that his great-Aunt Sophie has been checked into the hospital for some tests and then they took her to the Grenadier to stay for a while as she cannot walk very well right now. Charlie is visibly worried.
FYI - when we read our email yesterday, Charlie found out that his great-Aunt Sophie has been checked into the hospital for some tests and then they took her to the Grenadier to stay for a while as she cannot walk very well right now. Charlie is visibly worried.
July 21, 2004 1:45pm
The whale and iceberg boat tour was excellent - I even loved the cheesy Titanic theme music the captain played as we went around the iceberg. They are dirtier than you imagine. Carrying all that Greenland muck along for the 2-3 year journey.
Charlie just mailed some postcards. I asked him who the 3rd one was going to, and he said "Mary". Of course it was Mary. We've been having a really good couple of days - today on the tour boat was wonderful. Fired off an email to my mum and Charlie's parents and I'm just now - only now - wondering what's going on at the office on a Wednesday afternoon. Charlie is paying for gas - again - since his was a small fill-up the last time.
Last night, in lieu of a campfire, we toasted marshmallows over the propane stove in the VW van. This van is truly amazing - it has gotten us so far - rough road and all.
The fact that I haven't worried about work at all just goes to show you that they should really give my job to D___. I wonder how M___ is making out with her.
The newfs are really friendly people... so simple...could it be that that is the key to being happy?
I think muffin-head should return to Newfoundland before the GTA makes her hard. I haven't even seen St. John's yet and already I know I could live here - they have a great sense of humour - Charlie is speeding, so the writing is all over the place. Bye for now!
Charlie just mailed some postcards. I asked him who the 3rd one was going to, and he said "Mary". Of course it was Mary. We've been having a really good couple of days - today on the tour boat was wonderful. Fired off an email to my mum and Charlie's parents and I'm just now - only now - wondering what's going on at the office on a Wednesday afternoon. Charlie is paying for gas - again - since his was a small fill-up the last time.
Last night, in lieu of a campfire, we toasted marshmallows over the propane stove in the VW van. This van is truly amazing - it has gotten us so far - rough road and all.
The fact that I haven't worried about work at all just goes to show you that they should really give my job to D___. I wonder how M___ is making out with her.
The newfs are really friendly people... so simple...could it be that that is the key to being happy?
I think muffin-head should return to Newfoundland before the GTA makes her hard. I haven't even seen St. John's yet and already I know I could live here - they have a great sense of humour - Charlie is speeding, so the writing is all over the place. Bye for now!
July 20 7:00pm
I've sent Charlie to do the laundry - we're staying at Pistolet Bay Provincial Park outside St. Anthony's - love the newf accents! We drove into Raleigh, a little village just outside of Pistolet Bay and went to a little mini-market where some locals were shopping, the big event there was that the girl cashier had only given Charlie $4 in change for a $5 bill he'd given her.
He thought it was deliberate. Thought she wanted to stick it to him.
Gotta check the spaghetti.
He thought it was deliberate. Thought she wanted to stick it to him.
Gotta check the spaghetti.
July 20 5:30pm
We arrived in Labrador around 2:30pm - drove around and turned back toward the ferry to board it going back to Newfoundland at 3:30pm. Short trip. I, in my award-winning stellar performance as the patient and supportive girlfriend - said NOTHING.
Against every urge in every fibre of my being - I took this wasted (in my viewpoint) journey and turned it into a spontaneous adventure. Very hard to use this, though, and throw it back at C in an argument when you've already been the wonderful girlfriend.
We had the big chat about money and got that out of our system - I guess I was being very "Lena" by noticing that he was starting to really take us to the brink of empty not-a-drop-left when it was my turn to pay for gas and when it was his turn he'd fill up when there was still over a quarter tank left. I KNOW he's not being that petty. Calm reasoning has once again taken over.
What I wanted to write about earlier, but forgot, was that the trees in this area (down the Atlantic side of the Northern tip of Newfoundland) all look like they are permanently wind-blown in one direction - away from the ocean. The wind most likely blows on the coast off the water 90% of the time.
Anyway, a very good life lesson if you choose to see it. Life may not always be "on your side" - blowing the wind in your favour, but these trees certainly find a way to co-exist with the ocean's force - so why are we so often far less resilient? This was my own private little reminder to just let things happen - "everything is unfolding as it should".
We just stopped in Pine's Cove on our way to St. Anthony's where we will go iceberg and whale watching - but the reason we stopped was because there was a beached baby whale on the rocks - about 30 feet from the side of the road. Charlie got up close to it and made me film it - with him next to it. My witty camera banter for the viewers at home went something like this: "there's C___ next to a beached whale - (someone off camera yells out to tell him to get on top of its back) ...so I continue... "ya sweety, get up on it!" (aside, while camera is rolling, to the guy next to me I remark that he doesn't even like seafood). I thought it was pretty funny.
Against every urge in every fibre of my being - I took this wasted (in my viewpoint) journey and turned it into a spontaneous adventure. Very hard to use this, though, and throw it back at C in an argument when you've already been the wonderful girlfriend.
We had the big chat about money and got that out of our system - I guess I was being very "Lena" by noticing that he was starting to really take us to the brink of empty not-a-drop-left when it was my turn to pay for gas and when it was his turn he'd fill up when there was still over a quarter tank left. I KNOW he's not being that petty. Calm reasoning has once again taken over.
What I wanted to write about earlier, but forgot, was that the trees in this area (down the Atlantic side of the Northern tip of Newfoundland) all look like they are permanently wind-blown in one direction - away from the ocean. The wind most likely blows on the coast off the water 90% of the time.
Anyway, a very good life lesson if you choose to see it. Life may not always be "on your side" - blowing the wind in your favour, but these trees certainly find a way to co-exist with the ocean's force - so why are we so often far less resilient? This was my own private little reminder to just let things happen - "everything is unfolding as it should".
We just stopped in Pine's Cove on our way to St. Anthony's where we will go iceberg and whale watching - but the reason we stopped was because there was a beached baby whale on the rocks - about 30 feet from the side of the road. Charlie got up close to it and made me film it - with him next to it. My witty camera banter for the viewers at home went something like this: "there's C___ next to a beached whale - (someone off camera yells out to tell him to get on top of its back) ...so I continue... "ya sweety, get up on it!" (aside, while camera is rolling, to the guy next to me I remark that he doesn't even like seafood). I thought it was pretty funny.
July 20, 2004 12:00pm
Well, we made it to North Sydney yesterday afternoon, got in the stand-by line for the Newfoundland ferry that would be leaving @ 10:00pm. After napping and eating we got on and set sail. This thing was huge! It had easily held over a hundred cars, trucks and R.V.'s.
Charlie got a bunk that we shared and I wandered around a bit before joining him. So many newfs all in one place...friendly people. I made the mistake of taking gravol just before getting off the boat at 4:00am and have been groggy ever since.
We've made our way up the Northern Penninsula of Newfoundland to go to St. Anthony's where there are icebergs and also to board the ferry for Labrador. I'm sitting here worrying about whether the time in Labrador will be the same as in Newfoundland. A few feet away, in the Ferry ticket office is a guy in all his newf glory speaking in an almost completely incoherent language. He sounds like John McDonald, our old DM in the West...but more Newf than you could ever hear back in Ontario. He sounds just like the guy from King of the Hill, Boomhower.
Charlie and I have had a few tiffs, - whenever I need an answer to a question I should just accept that I have to take what I can get - whether the answer is clear or not. This, I have learned, will avoid fights and flare-ups.
Also, sleeping for several hours at a time in the van helps one to avoid arguments of any kind.
Newfoundland, so far, is a very beautiful and undeveloped land - nothing will resemble civilization until we get closer to St. John's.
I will probably run out of money in the next week or so. Oh well, if you don't hear of me returning, you'll know why. I will have picked up a waitressing job somewhere in Newfoundland and settled down in Heart's Delight, Heart's Desire or Heart's Content.
If only.
Charlie got a bunk that we shared and I wandered around a bit before joining him. So many newfs all in one place...friendly people. I made the mistake of taking gravol just before getting off the boat at 4:00am and have been groggy ever since.
We've made our way up the Northern Penninsula of Newfoundland to go to St. Anthony's where there are icebergs and also to board the ferry for Labrador. I'm sitting here worrying about whether the time in Labrador will be the same as in Newfoundland. A few feet away, in the Ferry ticket office is a guy in all his newf glory speaking in an almost completely incoherent language. He sounds like John McDonald, our old DM in the West...but more Newf than you could ever hear back in Ontario. He sounds just like the guy from King of the Hill, Boomhower.
Charlie and I have had a few tiffs, - whenever I need an answer to a question I should just accept that I have to take what I can get - whether the answer is clear or not. This, I have learned, will avoid fights and flare-ups.
Also, sleeping for several hours at a time in the van helps one to avoid arguments of any kind.
Newfoundland, so far, is a very beautiful and undeveloped land - nothing will resemble civilization until we get closer to St. John's.
I will probably run out of money in the next week or so. Oh well, if you don't hear of me returning, you'll know why. I will have picked up a waitressing job somewhere in Newfoundland and settled down in Heart's Delight, Heart's Desire or Heart's Content.
If only.
July 19 2:32pm
Sue-Sue, I hope you're writing in your OWN little journal - at least about work...and maybe muffin-head and our comic-in-training, and even Rudy...
July 19 2:20pm
I can't believe how many gadgets Charlie owns. Adaptors for adaptors that hook up to anti-adaptors, etc. We just stopped for ice cream in Cape North and I ordered Monkey Business. I know, I know - very childish to order it for the name, but also tasted good!
I've decided I will get a certificate at the U of T School of Continuing Studies - where a Pre-requisite is called "prior learning" and senior citizens are called "late learners".
Don't you just love PC?
I've decided I will get a certificate at the U of T School of Continuing Studies - where a Pre-requisite is called "prior learning" and senior citizens are called "late learners".
Don't you just love PC?
July 19, 2004
I am afraid of big hills.
We have been in Cape Breton Highlands National Park since yesterday evening and the drive up and down and around the mountain has scared the shit out of me - to the point of illogical frenzy. I can barely look up but the scenery is so beautiful I can't help it.
I think this (we're headed to Ingonish Beach at the south shore of Cape Breton, the other side of the park) is where I'll send Sue-Sue a postcard from.
We have stopped to check out our 3rd moose spotting. When 3 or more cars are stopped on the side of the road, that = a moose spotting. This one's a female, so ironically, it's not much to see - perhaps some stockings and a garter belt would have made a difference?
Charlie picked some daisies for me near Pleasant Bay and they are lovely. He's been amazing. We're at 445m in height on top of North Mountain right now. I am on moose-watch. My private little joke in the past day has been to chuckle at all the "Charlie's Music Store" signs we've passed.
Must get booze at next available place. According to some folks we just met on Little Smokey, we're headed for Big Smokey (holy F#@k!) I thought this was already big enough.
Right now, it is 11:00am in Toronto, and at the office, and I don't even care one iota about what is going on in that place. The Cabot Trail drive continues.
We have been in Cape Breton Highlands National Park since yesterday evening and the drive up and down and around the mountain has scared the shit out of me - to the point of illogical frenzy. I can barely look up but the scenery is so beautiful I can't help it.
I think this (we're headed to Ingonish Beach at the south shore of Cape Breton, the other side of the park) is where I'll send Sue-Sue a postcard from.
We have stopped to check out our 3rd moose spotting. When 3 or more cars are stopped on the side of the road, that = a moose spotting. This one's a female, so ironically, it's not much to see - perhaps some stockings and a garter belt would have made a difference?
Charlie picked some daisies for me near Pleasant Bay and they are lovely. He's been amazing. We're at 445m in height on top of North Mountain right now. I am on moose-watch. My private little joke in the past day has been to chuckle at all the "Charlie's Music Store" signs we've passed.
Must get booze at next available place. According to some folks we just met on Little Smokey, we're headed for Big Smokey (holy F#@k!) I thought this was already big enough.
Right now, it is 11:00am in Toronto, and at the office, and I don't even care one iota about what is going on in that place. The Cabot Trail drive continues.
July 18, later that day
Last night's drive was scary! driving up and down a very steep mountain-hill to get to Old Shipyard Beach campground. What a great place!
We woke up to fog all around us. At midnight the water was very close because the tide was in and in the morning it had disappeared. Charlie and I took a drive up to Chignecto Bay to see the "3 Sisters" and it was very off-road. I never knew I was such a scaredy cat.
We parked the van as far as we could take it and then biked to the trail - parked the bikes as far as we could take them (hid them in the bush) and hiked the rest of the way - Charlie was a great hiking guide. The scenery was majestic.
The sisters looked lik
e this picture. Imagine water all the way up to almost the very top of the points of these standing rock-islands when the tide was in, and this was them when the tide was out - over 75' high.
The Bay of Fundy was magical. I felt like I belonged there.
We passed a store with the name McCallister on it (like Craig!).
I angered Charlie only once or twice today. I've been nagging about him driving too fast and he said "well then why don't you f**king drive??!!" and I shut up.
I drove the VW for the first time today on the way back from Chignecto to the TransCanada Hwy. I also ate a McLobster for the first time. As I had feared, the experience was very anti-climactic (the McLobster).
We are now on our way to Cape Breton island - the very top (tip?) of it to camp there tonite.
Last night, as we rolled into our campsite at around 12:00am - in preparing for bed, etc., we heard a voice in the dark from the next campsite over - "ENOUGH with the doors!!", and even though irked, I admired the directness of the command.
We woke up to fog all around us. At midnight the water was very close because the tide was in and in the morning it had disappeared. Charlie and I took a drive up to Chignecto Bay to see the "3 Sisters" and it was very off-road. I never knew I was such a scaredy cat.
We parked the van as far as we could take it and then biked to the trail - parked the bikes as far as we could take them (hid them in the bush) and hiked the rest of the way - Charlie was a great hiking guide. The scenery was majestic.
The sisters looked lik
e this picture. Imagine water all the way up to almost the very top of the points of these standing rock-islands when the tide was in, and this was them when the tide was out - over 75' high.The Bay of Fundy was magical. I felt like I belonged there.
We passed a store with the name McCallister on it (like Craig!).
I angered Charlie only once or twice today. I've been nagging about him driving too fast and he said "well then why don't you f**king drive??!!" and I shut up.
I drove the VW for the first time today on the way back from Chignecto to the TransCanada Hwy. I also ate a McLobster for the first time. As I had feared, the experience was very anti-climactic (the McLobster).
We are now on our way to Cape Breton island - the very top (tip?) of it to camp there tonite.
Last night, as we rolled into our campsite at around 12:00am - in preparing for bed, etc., we heard a voice in the dark from the next campsite over - "ENOUGH with the doors!!", and even though irked, I admired the directness of the command.
July 18, 2004 early morning
One note re: dinner last night.
Horrible.
Charlie insisted we go to the Bar B Barn - supposedly, a great place for ribs and chicken.
Crap! Dry crap. But Charlie loved it!
I couldn't burst his bubble. He called it his Montreal tradition and so I played nice and kept the peace. I wanted something a little more ...French? And, as I took each bite, I vowed to myself, I would never return to the Bar B Barn.
Horrible.
Charlie insisted we go to the Bar B Barn - supposedly, a great place for ribs and chicken.
Crap! Dry crap. But Charlie loved it!
I couldn't burst his bubble. He called it his Montreal tradition and so I played nice and kept the peace. I wanted something a little more ...French? And, as I took each bite, I vowed to myself, I would never return to the Bar B Barn.
July 17th, 2004
A good first night passed at "Camping Imperial" in Quebec just outside the old city. It's Saturday and already, so far from home. Charlie is writing in his own little journal now. His writing is atrocious. I think it's kind of cute that he's been inspired to "journal" (think it's a verb). I keep waiting for the other RV'ers to emerge from their air-conditioned, satellite TV monster homes.
Oh man! The guy from the trailer-park register office just came over to talk to Charlie (perhaps a writing infraction? it wasn't in French) - and he says "Good Morning" and a few other things - all in English. But Charlie kept responding in French. What the hell? The man asks "did you register yet" and Charlie again answers in French. I see it as a little pretentious, and show-offy - he obviously spoke decent English, why respond in French???
I dare not mention it - it could only make him feel like I was putting him down. Now that Charlie has left with the park office guy I am greatly tempted to open up his journal and start reading it and other entries, "pre-Shirley". Don't even think about it Shirley.
Oh man! The guy from the trailer-park register office just came over to talk to Charlie (perhaps a writing infraction? it wasn't in French) - and he says "Good Morning" and a few other things - all in English. But Charlie kept responding in French. What the hell? The man asks "did you register yet" and Charlie again answers in French. I see it as a little pretentious, and show-offy - he obviously spoke decent English, why respond in French???
I dare not mention it - it could only make him feel like I was putting him down. Now that Charlie has left with the park office guy I am greatly tempted to open up his journal and start reading it and other entries, "pre-Shirley". Don't even think about it Shirley.
July 16, after 5:00pm
some asshole from New Brunswick just threw a cigarette butt out her window. If I could, I would stop every single one of these morons and make them go back and pick it up.
The rain has followed us all the way from Toronto, and Charlie surprisingly irked me only twice so far: once when he said that Chili and Lime PC chips were just "okay" and now when he's playing a f**king horrible loud obnoxious song by REM.
I didn't think these guys could EVER do loud and obnoxious. I stand corrected.
Re: my selling art idea from earlier today, after discussing the merits of this project with Charlie - he suggested that a good way to give the public the benefit of a true original one-of-a-kind would be to get shot at my own art show. Charlie made a funny. I'm still giggling about it an hour later.
The rain has followed us all the way from Toronto, and Charlie surprisingly irked me only twice so far: once when he said that Chili and Lime PC chips were just "okay" and now when he's playing a f**king horrible loud obnoxious song by REM.
I didn't think these guys could EVER do loud and obnoxious. I stand corrected.
Re: my selling art idea from earlier today, after discussing the merits of this project with Charlie - he suggested that a good way to give the public the benefit of a true original one-of-a-kind would be to get shot at my own art show. Charlie made a funny. I'm still giggling about it an hour later.
July 16, later that day
Idea for selling art: each piece is done in a different medium - ie: a mosaic, then an old masters' copy oil painting, an abstract in acrylic, a sculpture, a collage, illuminated manuscript - this way, the buyer (if he loves your work) is forced to break out of their groove, or they choose only one that fits .. All pieces can be linked somehow, a shape or colour or figure or theme ...must explore this idea further.
Our night in Quebec was uneventful.
Our night in Quebec was uneventful.
July 16, 2004 11:00am-ish
I'm still waiting for him. He's been in and out of that house...I can't count. "Bye Sophie - I love you!" I love you??? (how about "Shirley is hungry!!") ...hours later.
Turns out it was a thoughtful expression to an ailing old woman. I'm so judgemental.
Turns out it was a thoughtful expression to an ailing old woman. I'm so judgemental.
July 15, 2004 5:06pm
Shirley embraces Sue-Sue - A farewell to my dear friend - even now, as she talks fast - I will miss her. She gave me this journal to journal my thoughts while I'm away.
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